The relationship you have with your kids is not the same as the one you have with your spouse.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but he has been doing this for eight months. Apparently I've never seemed this happy before -no one can discourage anything that breathes new life into you like that. I can sense his hesitations in marriage and that sort of thing. We were friends for 4 years before we started dating 10 months ago.When he was courting me he promised me everything under the sun, including that I would never be second to his children. It's not all sunshine & roses though -you will have to deal with the kids and ex-wife emotions by yourself, you don't want the parental 'we told you so' -alone, because he will try, but never truly comprehend everything his baggage will put you through, emotionally and otherwise. He probably doesn't want them to be in the middle of any issues or especially a possible break-up. im dealing with the same thang its hard for my parents to understand the chose i made to date a man that is divorce with im going threw a divorce myself with kids like this man im what im doing is showing that im happy now cause of this showing them just me doing the right things in life that i wasnt doing before he came into my life. I am the only woman the kids have met, so he is very protective of them. He also travels alot for work,so in his limited free time he is torn between his kids OR me instead of me AND the kids?In my opinion only, it MAY be that he is just not comfortable enough with your relationship yet to involve his kids heavily. Try to be very understanding and have a long talk with him to express your concerns. I want him to be a good father, put his children first, go to all the fball games and track meets, but does that mean putting my feelings,needs,wants, on a shelf...settling?!Just remember that it is still the beginning and you might not end up with him anyway. Troe1113, I realize that the situations are not exactly the same, but you could be in for a long wait and not even know if he's going to involve you or not with his kids. We talk about it often but nothing has changed and he keeps telling me to be patient. I am 33 yrs old, never been married and want children of my own.If you do end up with him, I'm sure it will be because he treats you right. I'd say that you should talk to him and let him know if he will be a part of you by a certain date (before your first anniversary would be good, I think, but you may choose one that you prefer). I'm interested in knowing how things have turned out for you? I don't want to succomb to my family's pressure but they are so right.
Its pretty simple love is black and white either you do or you dont.